Six years of wedded bliss and zero arguments...just kidding. In the age of "facebook fake" as someone called it recently, I want to really be honest with you. Six years ago tonight I walked down the aisle and made a commitment before God and a whole bunch of people...probably some of you. It was the sweetest day. It was perfect (really...I wish I could do that day over and over). I knew that life would always be sweet and romantic and perfect. And it was. For a week.
The week we returned from our honeymoon, football started and reality set in. At some point I might have even said, "no one told me it would be this way." I might have been crying. I enjoy sports, so forever I thought it would be just perfect if I married a coach. And when God brought me my heart's desire, I realized it was not all pompoms and hugs after games. I was more like, "Where in the world is my husband? It's time for dinner." I learned to adjust, and we settled in. Everyone told us the first year would be the hardest. I beg to differ. The year a child arrives...THAT my friends, will test your marriage. Then you have another baby, and your husband is blessed with his first head football job all in the same month (and your dog barks all.the.time.) THAT will also test your marriage. It was hard. It still is hard. Marriage is work.
I've been reading a book (The Antelope in the Living Room- I highly recommend it!). It talks a lot about how our expectations of love and how it really is are very different things. Love is not all pompoms and hugs. It's not flowers and candlelit dinners. It's real life. In my house, love looks like drinking tea because there is one Coke Zero left and you know your wife will need it at 9:30 p.m. after the kids pass out. It looks like bringing home chocolate because you know it will make her happy. It looks like folding that load of clothes on the couch without being asked. (Typing this is making me think he shows way more love than I do.) Love looks like praying for your spouse even when they don't know it. Love is choosing to show grace. It's knowing your spouse isn't perfect and accepting them anyway. I do not have this thing down. I am learning. EVERY.DAY. My best friend gave me a card on our wedding day. She probably has no idea, but I have kept it in my Bible since then. It says, "Sometimes love is a choice." How true. It is making a choice to overlook imperfections. It's a pardon none of us deserve.
Bradley is so patient with me, y'all. (Me, not so much...working on that) God knew what he was doing when he brought us together. I am grateful for him. I'm grateful for the grace he shows me.
I don't write this to make you think it's always hard. It's not. Many days, it's easy. But on the days it's not easy, I don't want to bail out. I want to find a way to make it work. I want to be in this for the long haul. For better or for worse.
Thank you for the best 6 years, B. Looking forward to real life with you for many more.
